Overview
Overall, a great job. However, there is work to be done before we can submit to Taskstream. Not difficult just follow through.
I have attached the checklist. This is the guideline for requirements to pass the proposal. I suggest you open your proposal and open the checklist. I have commented in the proposal and in the checklist (met or not met). It looks a lot worse than it is. I promise! You can choose to begin with comments in proposal or comments in checklist. It will probably be easier to begin with proposal because you need to say the same thing consistently in the proposal. That is if you change something in the beginning of the proposal, you must continue saying it all the way through.
The overall comments are:
You cannot use a source in an in text citation to support directly what you are doing in your research. You can state you are doing something and indicate that it is supported/recommended by the source. But not that the source has commented on your research. It's not a hard fix. Most students do this. In a way it is about you putting the source in so you don't forget. An easy thing for students to do. I understand you are trying to use the source as support, but it cannot be written as if the source said whatever you are doing in their study ABOUT YOUR RESEARCH. Let me know if you don't understand what I mean by this.
Some sections seem to be out of order to the checklist. You should use the template. When you make revisions, you can just tell me that. I grade by the order of the checklst so If its different from the checklist, I will see it later......
Do you have an IRB approval? It seems you have altered the IRB forms, you are not permitted to do that. Also, I think your attachments may be outdated. Check the IRB site for latest attachments. Note that you CANNOT make any changes. Also, if you have not received preapproval from IRB you should go ahead and do that. After your proposal, you will let them know you have an approved proposal and are proceeding with the proposal as approved. We can discuss this. IRB has office hours, you can find it in OASIS on the student website.
Reference section. It looks pretty clean. I have offered comments that instruct as to how to edit the entire section for corrections - like article numbers, missing page numbers, missing volume or issue numbers. Let me know if you have questions. You need to run reciteworks at reciteworks.com to ensure you have in text citation for every reference citation and a reference citation for every in text citation.
You will need to put your document into Turnitin after you make all of the edits, before you email it back to me. I then have to review and make edits to it.
Your table of contents is corrupted. The writing center has instruction on this. You should be able to click on the page number and automatically go to it. When I click on a page number, it grays out part of the lines. This is not uncommon. You might have to download a fresh template.
No extra line spacing between sections. Only 2 line spaces.
Some of your in-text citations include the word "see" that is not correct. Please correct those.
I suggest you read through all of the comments in the proposal and the checklist before you begin so you have an overall idea of what has to be done.
References is one section of work.
In-text references is one section of work.
Then you have to just go through the proposal for corrections
Go back through the checklist.
Do not miss any corrections. I don't want to have to send it back because you didn't do them all. In order to get them all, you have to be systematic.
All of that aside, you did a pretty good job. We can move this fast if you have the time to make the updates. Please do a thorough job. It will make my review faster and I can evaluate it quickly if you do. There were a couple of additional points I wanted to make.
Consider the use of SME throughout the document for ease in reading.
I thought you did not have a source for the sample size. Many students utilize Saunder, et al (2019) You might consider this.
I will send you a sample of a prior student's proposal for you to use as a guide. She provided this in the classroom previously, but I will provide again with her permission. Attached.